Psychology words to inform, not to diagnose

Information sectionInformation · not a diagnosis12 words

Anxiety, burnout, narcissistic abuse, gaslighting… These words are everywhere, in the media and on social networks. Here, simply, is what they mean, the common beliefs around them and what is good to know.

FeaturedEmotions and anxiety

Anxiety

A state of worry that settles in, often without any precise danger. The body stays “on alert” as if something serious were about to happen. Some anxiety is normal; it becomes a problem when it takes over daily life.

“You just need to be rational about it.”

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Emotions and anxiety

Anxiety

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Common belief“You just need to be rational about it.”

In realityAnxiety is not controlled by willpower. It often has roots that are worth understanding.

Good to knowFor psychoanalysis, anxiety is a signal: it often expresses something we cannot yet put into words. Talking allows it to unfold.

Talk it through with a psychoanalyst Our support : Stress, anxiety and exhaustion →

Emotions and anxiety

Panic attack

A sudden surge of intense fear that peaks within minutes: you feel you are losing control, choking or about to faint. It is also called an anxiety attack.

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A sudden surge of intense fear that peaks within minutes: you feel you are losing control, choking or about to faint. It is also called an anxiety attack.

Common belief“You can die from it.”

In realityA panic attack is very frightening, but it is not dangerous in itself and always passes.

Good to knowAn attack is very frightening but passes on its own. After a first attack, or if there is chest pain, see a doctor to rule out a physical cause.

Talk it through with a psychoanalyst Our support : Stress, anxiety and exhaustion →

Emotions and anxiety

Phobia

An intense, specific fear — transport, heights, animals, other people's gaze… — out of all proportion to the real danger. The person knows it, but cannot act otherwise.

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An intense, specific fear — transport, heights, animals, other people's gaze… — out of all proportion to the real danger. The person knows it, but cannot act otherwise.

Common belief“Just face your fear.”

In realityForcing yourself abruptly can strengthen the fear. It helps more to understand what the fear protects.

Good to knowA phobia often shifts anxiety onto a precise object that is easier to avoid. Understanding this shift helps loosen the fear.

Talk it through with a psychoanalyst Our support : Clinical psychopathology: understanding psychological suffering →

Emotions and anxiety

Depression

Much more than “feeling low”: a sadness or emptiness that lasts for weeks, a loss of drive and pleasure, and the feeling that nothing will change.

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Much more than “feeling low”: a sadness or emptiness that lasts for weeks, a loss of drive and pleasure, and the feeling that nothing will change.

Common belief“It's a lack of willpower.”

In realityDepression is neither laziness nor weakness. It can be treated, and talking about it is already a first step.

Good to knowDepression can be treated. Diagnosis and any medication are a doctor's role; talking helps understand what has gone out. If suicidal thoughts appear, call 3114 (France).

Talk it through with a psychoanalyst Our support : Clinical psychopathology: understanding psychological suffering →

Exhaustion

Burnout

Deep exhaustion linked to work (or to a caring role), after a long period of pressure. You “hold on” until the moment you no longer can.

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Deep exhaustion linked to work (or to a caring role), after a long period of pressure. You “hold on” until the moment you no longer can.

Common belief“It only happens to fragile people.”

In realityIt often affects the most committed people, those who gave everything for a long time.

Good to knowThe World Health Organization describes it as an occupational phenomenon. Time off is sometimes necessary; understanding why you gave so much helps avoid starting again.

Talk it through with a psychoanalyst Our support : Stress, anxiety and exhaustion →

Exhaustion

Mental load

The invisible weight of everything you have to think about, anticipate and organise — at home and at work — on top of actually doing it. It is exhausting precisely because no one sees it.

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The invisible weight of everything you have to think about, anticipate and organise — at home and at work — on top of actually doing it. It is exhausting precisely because no one sees it.

Common belief“You just need to be better organised.”

In realityThe issue is not organisation, but being the only one who thinks of everything.

Good to knowIt is not a disorder, but a frequent source of exhaustion and of tension within couples and families.

Talk it through with a psychoanalyst Our support : Stress, anxiety and exhaustion →

Relationships

Narcissistic abuser

A very common expression (in French, “pervers narcissique”) for someone who manipulates, belittles and blames the other while presenting themselves as beyond reproach. The term comes from the psychoanalyst Paul-Claude Racamier.

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Common belief“Every selfish person is a narcissistic abuser.”

In realityThe term is often used too quickly. What matters is repeated manipulation and its effect on you.

Good to knowIt is not an official diagnosis, and the label is sometimes applied too quickly. What matters is not naming the other person, but understanding what you are going through and how to free yourself.

Talk it through with a psychoanalyst Our support : Emotional dependency and toxic relationships →

Relationships

Coercive control

A relationship in which one person gradually takes control of the other: their thoughts, choices and relationships. You do not fall into it all at once, which is why it is so hard to get out.

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A relationship in which one person gradually takes control of the other: their thoughts, choices and relationships. You do not fall into it all at once, which is why it is so hard to get out.

Common belief“You just have to leave.”

In realityCoercive control isolates and creates doubt: leaving often requires support, time and safety.

Good to knowIt can happen in a couple, a family, at work or in a group. In France, for violence: 3919 (free, anonymous helpline) or 17 in an emergency.

Talk it through with a psychoanalyst Our support : Domestic and family violence →

Relationships

Gaslighting

Manipulation that makes someone doubt their memory, perceptions or sanity (“you're making it up”, “that never happened”). The word comes from the film Gaslight (1944).

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Manipulation that makes someone doubt their memory, perceptions or sanity (“you're making it up”, “that never happened”). The word comes from the film Gaslight (1944).

Common belief“Only naive people fall for it.”

In realityManipulation is gradual: anyone can be targeted, whatever their age or background.

Good to knowWriting down the facts, talking to someone you trust and getting support help you find your bearings again.

Talk it through with a psychoanalyst Our support : Domestic and family violence →

Relationships

Emotional dependency

A need for the other so strong that you are ready to forget yourself so as not to lose them. Fear of abandonment overrides your own needs.

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A need for the other so strong that you are ready to forget yourself so as not to lose them. Fear of abandonment overrides your own needs.

Common belief“It's loving too much.”

In realityIt is not an excess of love, but often a deep fear of being abandoned.

Good to knowThis need is often rooted in the history of our earliest bonds. Psychoanalytic work helps understand it in order to love differently.

Talk it through with a psychoanalyst Our support : Emotional dependency and toxic relationships →

Life events

Trauma

The impact of an event that overwhelmed our ability to cope: an accident, an assault, a sudden loss, violence… It can leave traces long afterwards, sometimes years later.

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The impact of an event that overwhelmed our ability to cope: an accident, an assault, a sudden loss, violence… It can leave traces long afterwards, sometimes years later.

Common belief“Time heals everything.”

In realitySome wounds stay active until they can be put into words and linked to one's story.

Good to knowWhen symptoms last more than a month, it is called post-traumatic stress. Putting words to what happened, at your own pace, helps integrate it into your story.

Talk it through with a psychoanalyst Our support : Psychological trauma and post-traumatic stress →

Life events

High sensitivity

A way of feeling things more intensely than average: emotions, noise, atmospheres, other people's gaze. It is neither an illness nor a flaw, but a trait that can become heavy to live with.

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A way of feeling things more intensely than average: emotions, noise, atmospheres, other people's gaze. It is neither an illness nor a flaw, but a trait that can become heavy to live with.

Common belief“It's a flaw to fix.”

In realityIt is a way of being in the world, with real strengths too: empathy, subtlety, creativity.

Good to knowIt is not a diagnosis. The work is less about “correcting” this sensitivity than understanding it and living with it better.

Talk it through with a psychoanalyst Our support : Psychoanalysis and psychoanalytic consultation →

No word matches. The simplest thing may be to talk about it directly.

InformationThese explanations help put words to what you are going through. They replace neither a diagnosis, which is a doctor's role, nor a consultation.

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In an emergency in France: 15 (SAMU) · 3114 (suicide prevention, 24/7) · 112.